Until such time as someone comes up with a replacement mach3 compatible speed controller for the super X3 I've hooked up relays in parallel with the front keypad start/stop switches. So even though I'll have to set the speed manually I can start and stop the spindle from Mach3. I was going to do it with 2 outputs from mach and some custom macros but I realised that it was only going to work from M3 and M5 and there are a number of other reasons to stop the spindle (e-stop, accidental reboot, tripping over the LPT cable etc).
So this is what I have now:
I found some prebuilt relay/timer boards which can trigger on a grounded input - I'm sure someone with a bit of electronics experience could whip something up with a couple of 555's and relays wired directly into a single output.
The only reason I'm using 2 outputs to make sure the start pulse can only trigger if Mach3 is in control - when the PC boots all the outputs are high so all the relays close - same thing happens if the LPT cable is yanked. Spindle can only start if relay 8 is closed and relay 7 is open which should only happen if mach has control of the port.
Since I have an 8-way relay board (hence plenty of spare outputs) I use similar logic on the PS to the drives so the steppers can only be energised if output 1 is on and output 2 is off.