Jim,
You are asking the same thing I did about 2 weeks ago. I talked to Dean who is the creator of the Axxus board. He gave me the P/N for the proper relay from Digikey that works with his board. The P/N is 255-1135-ND The discription is "Relay Power SPDT 25A 12VDC"
I ordered 4 of them. I used two in a box with two 110 AC plugs that the relays turn on and off. I am using one of them for the spindle (router) on/off. I used pin 17 for this. It was so simple I don't know why I did not do this sooner.
Thanks
Jeff Davis (HomeCNC)
http://www.homecnc.info
(Note: The opinions expressed in this post are my own and are not necessarily those of CNCzone and its management)