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IndustryArena Forum > Community Club House > You know you're a machinist when....
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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    13

    You know you're a machinist when....

    - the shop's calendar contains either naked women, cool cars with naked women on them, or naked woman holding a chuck
    - after you complete a job and anodize, the client suddenly notices a change they want
    - everyone in the shop smokes
    - swearing is the most common form of communication


    and some more from American Machinist:


    • You help your kid do her math graphing homework and measure the points with a caliper.
    • Your girlfriend pulls in for a look at the junkyard without even asking you.
    • Your wife finds a chip in her bra and threatens to put some in your underwear, and that doesn't faze you.
    • You can't remember your wife's birthday or your wedding anniversary, but you can name all the tap drills up to 1 in.
    • You realize your not 1/10 as smart as you thought you were after one year on the job.
    • You let a young guy in your dept do it the wrong way first so the principle you show him when he asks for help is cemented in his noggin'.
    • You take your scale out of your pocket to stir your coffee then wipe it on your pants and return it to your pocket.
    • Someone from the front office asks to borrow your "ruler" you tell 'em you don't have one because you didn't realize they were talking about your coffee stirrer.
    • You lay down to go to sleep and wake up with the solution to a difficult setup you are working on...and it happens on a regular basis.
    • Someone asks you to build something that has never been built before, and you know what part to make first.
    • You curse whoever designed that new tool you bought. Then you redesign the faulty part and make it.
    • You go to a trade show and get annoyed because the booth babes are standing in front of the machines.
    • You tell someone they can't use a machine not because you're worried they'll cut their finger off, but that they'll break the machine and you'll have to fix it.
    • You can hear a shop full of equipment running and tell which one is having a problem.
    • You see the fractional tolerances of carpentry and you shake your head.
    • You can feel 0.001 in."
    • Friends you have not seen for a while drop by for a visit with a "sketch" of something they need made.
    • You dare not walk on carpet because of the blue chips wedged in the soles of your shoes.
    • You decorate the Christmas tree at work with long metal shavings instead of garland.
    • You can think of six other things you are qualified to do that pay more, but you don't even try.
    • Your heart fills with joy when someone hands you a freshly hardened piece of 16MnCr5 with a fine grey surface texture.
    • You ride a roller coaster, and the first hill gives you the same feeling as watching the first rapid Z move on a new program.
    • You grab the Machinist Bible to look something up, and you spend some time just thumbing thru it reading things you find interesting.
    • You answer naive questions by saying: "If there were no machinists there would be no machine tools, or machines that make stuff, or stuff to buy. Everything depends on a machinist for their manufacturing or processing. Without them the economy would collapse. Nothing of our culture would survive the next generation."


    ...feeel free to add your own!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    1084
    Yeah, that's about it! It's either in your blood, or you move "up" to sales...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    355
    -You mentally estimate the rpm of every spinning object you see.

    -Your supervisor has an idea about running aluminum dry to save time, and you just smile and say you'll give it a try. Knowing damn well that you won't because he's an idiot.

    -You know the decimal values of the reciprocals of the powers of 2.
    Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    1084
    - You damn near cut your finger off, but you don't realize it until you see blood everywhere and have to look and see what finger is bleeding...

    - "Super Glue" is your replacement for stiches

  5. #5
    and the only reason you put on a band-aid is so you dont bleed all over the parts
    A poet knows no boundary yet he is bound to the boundaries of ones own mind !! ........

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3154
    You take your scale out of your pocket to stir your coffee then wipe it on your pants and return it to your pocket.

    You lay down to go to sleep and wake up with the solution to a difficult setup you are working on...and it happens on a regular basis.
    These are my 2 favourites and very very true, however my solutions always hit me while I am soaking in the shower.
    www.integratedmechanical.ca

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    12177
    Quote Originally Posted by DareBee View Post
    These are my 2 favourites and very very true, however my solutions always hit me while I am soaking in the shower.
    You are lucky, mine is nearly always about 2:00 am and I never get back to sleep and am so tired when I get up I forget everything.
    An open mind is a virtue...so long as all the common sense has not leaked out.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3154
    LOL

    Men your age tend to get up at 5am for no apparent reason anyway
    www.integratedmechanical.ca

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    2712
    Eventually You will too!!! (if you live long enough. No threat, just fact.) LOL

    Dick Z
    DZASTR

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    355
    - Your favorite reading material is an Enco catalog.

    - You avoid going to stores that don't have a hardware department.

    - You spend 40 hrs a week at work, and another 20 hrs online talking about it.

    - Your friends don't understand your obsession with CNCzone.
    Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    474

    Quote Originally Posted by sp4i6 View Post

    • You can't remember your wife's birthday or your wedding anniversary, but you can name all the tap drills up to 1 in.
    • You take your scale out of your pocket to stir your coffee then wipe it on your pants and return it to your pocket.
    • You see the fractional tolerances of carpentry and you shake your head.
    • You can feel 0.001 in."
    • Friends you have not seen for a while drop by for a visit with a "sketch" of something they need made.
    • You dare not walk on carpet because of the blue chips wedged in the soles of your shoes.
    • You grab the Machinist Bible to look something up, and you spend some time just thumbing thru it reading things you find interesting.
    I'm picking these out because they certainly apply to me! Great list!

    I had to reply, I want to watch the new additions to the thread.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    307
    Glad im not alone! lol

    Need to make a shirt with these on it.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Posts
    761
    You wear hats because the hot chips keep burning your hair.
    Wayne Hill

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    1084
    Quote Originally Posted by WayneHill View Post
    You wear hats because the hot chips keep burning your hair.
    Nah, that's welding. I remember when I did my 3g/4g SMAW cert., my stubborn ass wouldn't wear a welders cap, I got home and took a shower, I though I was going to be bald! Hair falling everywhere, clogged the drain!

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    474
    Quote Originally Posted by Eurisko View Post
    - Your favorite reading material is an Enco catalog.
    - You avoid going to stores that don't have a hardware department.
    - You spend 40 hrs a week at work, and another 20 hrs online talking about it.
    - Your friends don't understand your obsession with CNCzone.
    Not the Enco catalog, or the "Machinist's bible", but "Mark's Standard Handbook for Mechanical Engineers", a great book, I could read it for hours.

    Good point about the extra 20 hours...not just talking about it, but don't most of us come home and keep making chips/smoke/sparks/dust...whichever?

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    887
    I do not classify my self as a machinist, but I have worked in a machine shop that opne of my best friends owns, here are some observations...
    When you can feel a 2 degree taper on a bore.
    When the rest of the keys on your CAD/CAM computer keyboard are dirty as hell, but the backspace, x y and Zero buttons are clean
    When the start and stop buttons on a machining center are the cleanest buttons on the control panel
    When your running a manual lathe across the shop and you hear a faint "TINK" sound and you automatically yell "Tool BROKE" to one of the CNC operators
    When you use the depth side of the calipers to figure out how much super glue is need to close the cut on your hand.
    When in your sleep, you mumble the words "GO BABY GO"
    You hear a loud crash from someone dropping apart on the shop floor, and you instanly yell, "Job opening", or "Payroll deduct!"

  17. #17
    - When you give up on trying to train Tech School students
    - When you just grin and nod to your supervisor and let him think he knows what he's talking about and you just do it the right way and get it done
    - When you don't get scared anymore about looking at different kinds of parts you have never even imagined before

    And when you can say....

    - WE CAN MAKE ANYTHING!!!!!
    (with the disclosure of if you have enough time and money.....)

    http://www.cncbasics.com
    www.cncbasics.com

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    460

    You know your a machinist when

    You wear a hat to keep the chip's from burning where your hair once was

    You use ship towel and masking tape for bandaid's

    use the draw oven to warm your lunch

    spend the time to wright the code to open a 12 ounce can with a VMC.

    strike an arc to light the tourch to light your smoke's

    use the BBQ grill to preheat a part to weld

    use the shop dog's water dish to quench a part.

    you give directions to someone in +-X&YG1,2&3 rather than right or left Ect..

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    3634
    you give directions to someone in +-X&YG1,2&3 rather than right or left Ect..


    Good one

    So when they get on the Highway that would be a "G0" rapid move.


    .
    Free DXF - vectorink.com

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    887
    wouldnt a G0 on the highway result in a ticket? I know it does for me. I think you would need a G01 F 65

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